Friday, July 10, 2009

How to waste 3.5 hours of your life

1. Erase your brain of any and all computer knowledge.
2. Decide that you want to share music that no one is interested in.
3. Go to your iTunes and look for your album of Patrice Michaels performing "Songs About Spring."
4. Realize that you lost the album in transit between old hard drive and external hard drive.
5. Go instead to your senior recital and listen with gritted teeth to your own poor rendition of said cycle. Decide that you're a glutton for punishment, and it'll have to do.
6. Burn CD of senior recital in wma format.
7. Rip CD back onto computer using Windows Media Player. Pat yourself on the back for what you think is a job well-done.
8. Write short snippet about e.e. cummings and Dominic Argento.
9. Crinkle your brow in puzzlement and wonder how to get music clips onto your blog without making them into videos. Present this conundrum to the Google God, and be led to this website.
10. Follow the website's messy instructions. Register for accounts here, and here and even here. Spend at least 7 minutes coming up with cheesy username (SuzieMuse).
11. Upload ripped files to your new file hosting accounts.
12. Embed your masterpiece into blog. Preview. Play. Not working? Hmmm...
13. Go back to the Google God with your dilemma. Beg and plead and search for the meaning of all this. Get distracted on wikipedia's entry about e.e. cummings.
14. Learn that the website whose messy instructions you've been following is out of date, and therefor promotes a media player that no longer exists.
15. Find another website. Follow its instructions. Embed. Preview. Play. Nothing.
16. Google God.
17. Learn the difference between wma and mp3 files.
18. Download a converter.
19. Convert your previously ripped files to mp3's.
20. Repeat step 11. Embed. Preview. Play. Nothing.
21. Beg your friend Tom to go to your blog and click play. Bang your head against the wall when he says it's working for him.
22. Open a different browser. Hit play. Grit teeth at poor rendition again and quickly hit pause.
23. Ask Tom WHY???!?!?! Click on link he sends.
24. Download new flashplayer. Bingo.
25. Spend the next 30 minutes editing the html so that the damn thing won't auto play or loop.
26. Be happy for the things you've learned and for godsake change the poopy diaper that's been wafting in your distracted face for the past 45 mintutes.
27. Beat the dead horse and waste time writing a blog about wasting time.


Anonymous said...

That sucks. So....where's the rest of the blog?

Suzie said...

. . . I don't understand the question.