Good Monday to you

I have no dreams for your today. Only a few thoughts and updates.

1. You know when someone says something really snide to you in chat or on facebook, and follows it up with a smiley? Here are some fictional mixed with non-fictional examples:

     "I consider your opinion to be a self righteous pet-peeve. No offense. :)"

     "Aw, are you having a bad day? Don't worry, it could be so much worse! :)"

     "People who can't afford health care are just too lazy to work, IMO. :)"

Ok, I really thought I'd have more examples than that. A simple smiley can make a comment just a little saltier. A little more evil. :) Emoticons let a person get away with saying anything they want, including nothing at all. Sometimes I just want to pick up that little smiley and take him between my fingers and pop him like a grape. Seriously. And I KNOW I'm guilty of doing it too. That's why I'm stopping. To.day. If you catch me "emoting" in a hurtful way, please call me out.

2. So I quit "365 Photos," like I knew I probably would. Sorry, Tenessa. :(  (<-----Is that one ok?) I find myself taking MORE boring pictures than usual, because I'm desperate for something to post. That, and only a few people are checking it (yes, I can see you!). Maybe when I figure out how to put "new photo" notifications on my home page I'll pick it up again.

3. Speaking of which, I really need to learn html. there's just no way around it! Grrrrr.....

4. I've just been in a nasty little "blah" mood lately, and I can't seem to shake it. My muse eludes me, my words taste like a dry piece of toast, and I keep telling myself "if I could JUST have some time to myself, I'd get over this. I'd read, I'd write, I'd sleep . . . and I'd feel better." I know that isn't true, though. I don't know what I need. And that's the most frustrating thing of all.

5. Mother's Day is beginning to feel like another birthday. And I don't mean in the gift giving, cake making, balloon tossing and candle counting way. I mean in a "this day will be better than all other days" kind of way. A "you can't be mean to me because it's MY day! MINE!" sort of way. A full-day spa, lounging with cucumbers on my eyes while men in loin cloths bring me cocktails with little umbrellas, sleep in a bed of silken rose petals with no disturbances day. And I kind of hate that. Because it never is. It's just another day like any other. Your kids still fight, cry, and poop their pants. Your face breaks out from too much stress and chocolate. You start your period. The food is cold at the Mother's Day lunch buffet. It rains. And all the while you're thinking "this is NOT how it's supposed to be! This day was meant to be perfect! I'm a mother now! I get this day to celebrate ME! ME! ME!" . . . and if that's how M-day is going to feel (admittedly due to my own selfishness), then who needs it? Maybe if I'd focused a little more on my own mom I wouldn't have felt that way. But there you go. Imperfect me.